My Job

I travel a lot.  When I say travel I mean drive.  In the last five years, I have spent 75% of my life driving. I have been to Georgia, Alabama, Tennessee, North Carolina, South Carolina, Virginia, Washington DC, Maryland, Delaware, Pennsylvania and New Jersey (but I do not count New Jersey because I am from there.) The things that I enjoy the most from all of this traveling is the solitude, I get to spend hours and hours of nothing but me and my mind. The lack of friends, home and family make this job perfect for me.  I have found that in order to do this job well, you need to let go of all those desires that make going home important.  If you have no relationship, there is no one to miss or long for, if you have no family, again, no one to miss you or be glad to see you return. Friends are possible, but after you turn down too many invitations for cook-outs, parties, birthdays and holiday events, people get the hint and stop sending invitations (why bother?)  Not having a place to live is also important.  I do not own a home or property.  I don’t even rent an apartment.  I pay people money to let me sleep on their couch while I am in the town of my residence.  As of now I pay a relative a monthly rate to stay in one of their spare bedrooms.

If you can deal with the lack of sleep, aching back, hemorrhoids, chain-smoking cigarettes, coffee and a diet of fast food mini mart cuisine, not to mention the consumption of alcohol that is needed to help you cope with the shitty nightmare that you have created for yourself, this job may be perfect for you.  If on the other hand, you care about such things as a healthy body, mind and spirit, not so much.

I am an Environmental Consultant, which means, I inspect buildings for Asbestos, Lead and Mold.  The job in and of itself is not so bad, the threat of lung cancer, Asbestosis, Mesothelioma and, lead poisoning are a minor concern but they are the least of my worries.  I am certain that the alcohol, caffeine, cigarettes and fast food will do away with me long before the environmental hazards will.

Now, those few, very few, that read this might say “Well why don’t you quit? Get another job? The only reply I have to that is…but I get to travel a lot.


About Robert Elbertson

Welcome to my page. I'm a middle aged man, who smokes too much and drinks too much. I like to pretend that I'm a writer. I'm certain, that as you read my posts, that you will find that I am not. No matter. Feel free to read, comment, give feedback, good or bad, serious critiquing will be appreciated. The only way I can get better, is to receive feedback on what I write. I really don't care if you feel the need to be harsh. I deal with assholes on a daily basis. But, if the criticism is intended to help me get better, then I am all for it. I am looking forward to this new venture. Thank you for your time. View all posts by Robert Elbertson

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